Be Thankful To Your Ex

Exes are commonly known as the bad guy. The exes will always be the one to be blamed, as if the other person is perfect and did nothing wrong. The exes will always get a bad reputation among friends. A one-sided story will be told about the exes and this person will drag all his/her friends to be on his/her side, to hate his/her ex or exes. Why does this happen? Is it for revenge? Is it hatred? Or is it just

"I don't wanna see him/her happy."

How many of us still get along with their exes? A few, right? Why is that? These could be the answers,

"I hate her/him. I don't wanna see her/his face ever again!"

"She/He broke my heart. Seeing her/him brings back memories. Then, I will feel sad."

"He/She cheated and lied on me. I will never forgive him/her."

Okay. Now, let's put the hate aside and let's focus on what the break up will lead to.

After the break up, it would take roughly, few weeks, few months or years to get over it. Of course, during the process, lots of tears will emerge and the pain will hurt so bad for both, especially the one being dumped.

But let's look at what happens next. They will find a replacement. Normally the replacement will be way better than the ex. They will always compare on how amazing and better the new guy is, with their ex.  They will also not repeat the same mistakes that they did with their ex. The replacement might then work out, or not. If not, then, there are still other fishes in the sea. If it does, it should end up with a marriage and they live happily ever after. So, stop complaining.

Well, if it wasn't for their ex who messed up and had been a terrible girlfriend/boyfriend, they wouldn't end up with their new and present partner. They won’t appreciate their new girlfriend/boyfriend if it wasn't for the problems their ex created, back then.

So, don’t feel regret of having an ex or exes. If you regret it, then, it means that you also regret having your present girlfriend/boyfriend/wife/husband. Then, these statements will come up,

“Why didn’t I meet you earlier, before I knew my ex?”

“If I knew you before him/her, I would choose you.”

No, no, no, no!

Don’t ever think like that. It is fate and destined. It is a sequence. One event leads to another. So, having your ex, was a part of the journey, which means, without your ex appearing in your life, you won't meet your present wife/husband, and live happily.

Let me give you an example.

Mr. T had a girlfriend. They studied together in the uni. They planned to work in the same place, after graduating.  Let’s say, Puchong. But then, half way through their relationship, they had a big fight and broke up. After graduating, Mr. T avoided working in Puchong(didn’t want the same place as his ex), then, tried finding a job in some place else and found a job in Bangi. Mr. T later on, met a nice girl at his work place, got married to her, and enjoyed a marriage.

So, the moral of the story. If Mr. T didn’t break up with his ex and if he didn’t avoid finding a place in Puchong, then, he wouldn’t have met his present wife. So, Mr. T and his wife actually have to say thank you to Mr. T’s ex for breaking up. That is the kind of fate that is decided by Allah SWT. Take it in a positive way and wish the best for your ex so that he/she will find the right one for him/her just like you find yours.

So next time if you bump into your ex anywhere, just say 'thank you' to him/her.